Two Months Into My First Job and I’m Already Rethinking Everything

 Here's A Gen Z’s Survival Story in Corporate India (Without Losing My Mind... Hopefully)

If I had a rupee for every time someone told me, “Welcome to the real world” in the last two months,
I’d probably have enough to fund my skincare routine (screw you, acne) and the iced coffees that are now powering my 9-to-5 life. (10-to-7, if I’m being honest.)

It’s been 70 days since I entered the corporate jungle—yes, I’m counting—and honestly? I’m not thriving, but I’m not crashing either. I’m floating somewhere in a weird limbo where my dreams, deadlines, and dwindling attention span are all fighting for airtime.

Before the Job: I Was That Girl

Two months ago, I was living on my own schedule:
Freelance gigs, obsessing over blog stats, working on my book (main character energy, obviously), and binge-watching Made in Heaven like it was market research.

• I read books for fun (okay, not like 6th-grade me, but I did what my attention span could handle).
• I spent hours planning Instagram content (and deleting half of it because… who’s even watching, lmao?).
• Late-night walks to manifest my dream life? Check. (Also doubled as my desperate attempt to hit 10k steps.)
• Chai breaks felt like a Bollywood movie montage. (Alright, it was beer. But I’m trying to keep this blog family-friendly. STFU.)

Now? If I reply to a single WhatsApp message before passing out, it’s a personal win.

My Life Now Feels Like a LinkedIn Simulation

Here’s what a typical day looks like:

• 8:00 AM: Wake up. Immediately start negotiating with myself about getting five more minutes.
• 9:30 AM: Coffee. Sometimes green tea (because wellness era, but mostly lies).
• 10:00 AM - 7:00 PM: Emails, meetings, smiling politely on GMeet, wondering if I said “Thanks!” too enthusiastically… or not enough.
• 7:30 PM: Brain = deep-fried. Scroll Instagram reels like it's “research” for my side hustle.
• Midnight: Overthink. Sleep. Repeat.

Welcome to the Corporate Desi Girl Starter Pack™.

Mental Shifts I Was NOT Ready For

• My Vocabulary Is Terrifying Now: Every sentence starts with “Just following up…” or “Looping you in…” I used to write poetry. Now I write emails that feel like hostage letters.
• Overthinking, But Make It Professional: Did I sound rude in that GMeet message? Should I have added an exclamation mark? Why did I say "No worries at all!" when I was clearly panicking internally?
• Productivity Is Not Equal To Fulfillment: Sure, I'm getting things done, but where's the satisfaction? I'm checking tasks, not chasing purpose. 
• Work Brain vs. Real Brain: Remember that Spongebob episode where he forgets everything except "fine dining and breathing"? Yeah, that's me now. Except, all I remember is how to write "Per my last email..."

Am I Losing Myself in the Process?

It’s not just the schedule that’s exhausting—it’s the quiet identity shift no one warns you about.

I used to be that girl who stayed up late watching new releases the minute they dropped,
writing chaotic blog posts with too many exclamation marks, and dancing around my room like the lead in a coming-of-age film.

Now? I’m carefully wording Slack messages and wondering if my manager secretly resents me.
(Hi, if you're reading this—just kidding! Kind of.)

I feel like Mia Thermopolis before she found out she was the Princess of Genovia.
Except no one’s offering me a castle—just 20 unread emails and a calendar invite titled “Sync?”

The Mini Griefs No One Talks About

• Scheduling catch-ups two weeks in advance
• Saying "Let's do a call" instead of just...talking
• Feeling too mentally drained to even finish a 20-minute YouTube video
• Missing the version of me who had time to dream, not just doom-scroll.
• Becoming the very person I swore I wouldn't: the "I hate work" girl

Guess who's humbled now?

The Lies I Told Myself Before Starting Work

• “I’ll wake up early and work out before work!” I laughed just typing that.
• “I’ll cook every night, save money, and be so healthy!” Zomato says hello.
• “Work will give my life structure!”More like containment.

How I’m Fighting to Stay Me and You Can Too

I may be deep in the corporate trenches, but I'm still fighting to hold on to my core self.

Here's what's helping me:

• Micro-creativity breaks: Journaling for 5 minutes. Writing poems no one reads. Drafting blog ideas at 2 am and instantly regretting it.
• A daily romantic ritual: Long, slow showers, watching the sunset without filming it, staring at the ceiling with music on.
• Declaring a "no productivity night": No planning. No meal-prep (as if I cook anyway). No goals. Just vibes. Not a revolution, I know. But, it's something. 

Final Thoughts: Still Figuring It Out, One Caffeine Hit at a Time

Some days, I romanticize the routine and feel like I’m finally “that girl” who has it all together.
Other days, I want to throw my laptop into a river and flee to the hills with zero network.

But most days? I’m just trying not to lose myself in the noise.

Here’s what I’ve learned so far in my first job experience in India:

• You don’t have to “crack corporate life” in 70 days.
• It’s okay to mourn the version of you that had more time, more dreams, and fewer deadlines.
• You’re still you, even if you sometimes forget.

Let’s Talk:

Are you also navigating your first job and wondering who you are anymore?
What’s one small thing you’re doing to hold on to yourself?

Drop your thoughts in the comments—or DM me on Instagram.
Let’s survive this shift together.